The March of Time

I have never taken this long a break from this journal. I have also never had a month like this past March. I've tried writing about it several times, and every attempt has seemed hollow and incomplete. Instead of writing, then, I'm just going to list. Here's where I've been.

Our car died in the last week of February.
We bought a used Subaru Forester.
I gave my exams.
I graded my exams.
I wrote my students' comments.
I drove to Richmond.
Kelly and I drove the Forester from Richmond to Fayetteville after she got off work.
We got up and took her mother Ruth to the hospital for a scheduled heart test.
The tests showed significant obstruction in Ruth's cardiac vessels.
The cardiologist scheduled bypass surgery--perhaps a double bypass, he said.
Ruth had an allergic reaction to the adhesive used to connect the EKG leads during the test.
We took Ruth to the clinic three times in four days to try and control the reaction.
On day three, I drove to Lillington for a morning of birding with my friend Mary. Then I drove back to Fayetteville.
Ruth finally got a steroid shot on day four and her reaction died down.
On day five, we took Ruth to surgery.
The surgeon realized Ruth had FOUR blockages; he completed a quadruple bypass.
We stayed with Ruth until she came out of the anesthesia.
We came to see her after they took her breathing tube out.
We drove to Richmond. I dropped off Kelly and drove home.
I got up and got a call from my mother: my 99-year-old grandmother had died early that morning.
I put on my interview outfit, drove back to Richmond, and had a job interview.
I spent the night with Kelly, then drove back home.
I packed my bags, spent the night at home, and drove back to Richmond.
Aunt Linda, Uncle John, and my cousin Joshua picked me up and drove me to Savannah.
My parents met us in Savannah and drove me to our hotel..
I got up the next morning and went to my grandmother's funeral.
My cousins and I served as pallbearers.
My brother gave a speech about Mama Lea and burst into tears.
I gave a speech about Mama Lea and burst into tears.
Joshua gave a speech about Mama Lea and somehow kept his composure.
We returned to the hotel and at a lunch provided by the ladies of the synogogue.
I collapsed for a short nap.
The entire family went to Mama Lea's favorite restaurant, Johnny Harris's, and dined in her honor.
I fell asleep at the hotel.
I got up and drove home with my cousin Indira.
The next morning classes began.

Basically, on every single day of March, I was either working, taking someone to a medical appointment, driving to another town, or attending a funeral. The ragged edge of exhaustion was my new home. And when there finally came an April day when I didn't have to do anything... I just didn't have the strength to write about it.

It was not a good time. There were good moments, absolutely. Here's a picture of the Cape Fear River that I took during my morning with Mary at Raven Rock State Park:

DSC02560.JPG
But as a whole, March 2015 is not a month I ever want to duplicate.

And now that I've said my goodbyes, and caught my breath, and opened this journal again, it's time to march on.

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This page contains a single entry by Peter Cashwell published on April 15, 2015 8:56 PM.

Not Out of the Woods Yet was the previous entry in this blog.

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